Growth - Antichristmas (2020)

Band: Growth

Album: Antichristmas

Year: 2020

Genre: "New wave of dark industrial blackened synthpop" (self-described)
Country: France

Track List:  

1. Santa's claws
2. Blood under the Christmas tree

Bandcamp

Franz de Byl - Und (1972)

Band: Franz de Byl

Album: Und

Year: 1972

Genre: Blues Rock
Country: Germany

Track List:  

1. I Got Trouble
2. African Girl
3. I Wish I Could Ride
4. Just A Little Bit Something
5. Birthday (The World's Gates)
6. I Don't Mind
7. Franz Wanz Ran And Fell

 Franz De Byl has been described as “one of the most curious characters ever to emerge from the Berlin underground.” In 1972 the German classical record label Thorofon released his debut solo album ‘Und’ which has been called, “an eccentric collection of freaky acoustic folk songs with bluesy elements and an extra satirical, political twist.”

The album evidently caught the attention of Nurse With Wound who subsequently included Franz De Byl as one of 291 musicians and bands on the now well-known list of alternative, underground and avant-garde music first compiled back in 1979.

However - flash forward to the 21st Century – Franz threatened to sue Nurse With Wound because they didn’t ask for his consent (back in 1979) and therefore it constituted a copyright infringement.

But not only that – he also threatened to sue sites like Discogs and RYM for including his albums. A brief history of which can be read about on RYM:

"Franz de Byl does not understand one thing and that thing is the internet. Oh boy...

This guy is absolutely insane! Where do I begin... well, he's been threatening Steven Stapleton for some time because he believes the Nurse With Wound list is a work of copyright infringement. Franz wants to sue Stapleton because he didn't ask for his consent way back in 1979 when the list was published in the liner notes of Chance Meeting. No, I'm serious.

The madness of King Franz does not stop there. He's also threatened to sue sites like Discogs and RYM for including his albums, obviously a form of copyright infringement. This guy actually wrote a nonsensical letter to Sharifi: "Dear Mr. Sharifi, I am absolutely angry about your behaviour and I cannot see any respect for me as a hardly betrayed artist since the year 1970..."

He's probably just pissed off because his collaboration album with Heiner Hohnhaus has an average rating of 1.98...

I'm only scratching the surface of this guy's craziness. When this blog reported Franz's behaviour he flooded the site with bizarre abusive messages, e.g. typing "you are a motherfucking motherfucker" a ridiculous amount of times and saying "You're nothing but a sucker, a no name, a wanker and coward, a KGB and Ku Klux Klanny motherfucker!" In one rant he attributes a quote to Frank Zappa - the quote itself was never actually said by FZ, but hey, at least it shows Franz has a good taste in music.

Good lord, just have a look for yourself. I'd say Franz's behaviour has to be seen to be believed, but I've seen it and I still don't believe it!

But what's the music of this guy like? Actually pretty good! And not as insane as his beyond bizarre online rants would suggest. This album isn't particularly sophisticated - it's all based around acoustic guitar and vocals. "African Girl" contains about two chords played over and over for seven minutes. The enjoyable thing is the low key, intimate vibe that's pleasant but maybe slightly unnerving. It's odd feeling intimate with Franz de Byl...

There's also some fantastic guitar playing. The solo in "Birthday" is downright beautiful! Franz can get down and dirty as proved by the raw acoustic blues of the opening track, "I Got Trouble".

This isn't the kind of thing you can listen to over and over - one neat little play sums it up nicely. But this is a memorable album. 40 minutes in the presence of Franz de Byl isn't exactly something you forget. His lyrics make no sense, I think he's trying to tell some kind of story in "African Girl" but there won't be a man alive who'll be able to follow it. And that's all part of the charm.

Of course, by writing a review of this album, I'm committing the heinous crime of copyright infringement and Franz'll sue me for this. Hell, it's probably copyright infringement to mention the titles of his songs or even refer to the guy by name!

I look forward to my day in court with you, Franz! Now I'd better get ready for some serious jail time...'

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Bulldozer - Dance Got Sick! (1992)

Band: Bulldozer

Album: Dance Got Sick!

Year: 1992

Genre: Techno/Rapcore
Country: Italy

Track List:  

1. Dance Got Sick! (Part 1) (Thrash Rappcore Version 1)
2. Dance Got Sick! (Part 1) (Thrash Rappcore Version 2)
3. Dance Got Sick! (Part 2) (Core Rap Version)
4. Dance Got Sick! (Part 3) (Tech Core Rap Sickness)

The infamous techno/rap EP from the Italian proto-black metal pioneers Bulldozer. Honestly it sounds like very early nu-metal to me, released an year before the first demo by Korn. As a bonus, an even worse 1994 single "Yum Yum (I Want The Pussy)":

Fearless North Koreans From Hell - split w/ Satanity (2017)

Band: Fearless North Koreans From Hell

Album: s/t split w/ Satanity

Year: 2017

Genre: Black Metal/Noisecore
Country: Germany

Track List:  

1. No Peace With Dogs
2. Long March
3. Eternal Leader
4. Ryugyong
5. For The Greater Glory Of Juche 

30 years after the debut album by Fearless Iranians From Hell...

Playlist

Ancient Chinese Penis - Fistful O' Penis + Envy (1992-93)

Band: Ancient Chinese Penis

Album: Fistful O' Penis + Envy

Year: 1992-1993

Genre: Hardcore Punk
Country: USA

Track List:

Fistful O' Penis:

1.  Intro/Penis Polka
2. 4-in-1 Penis Combo
3. Bible Belt Blues
4. Please Don't Kill Me Or Eat Me
5. Bureaucratic Itch
6. Dictators Sharing A Bed
7. Bible Belt Blues 2
8. Penis Polka (reprise)

Envy:

1. Intro/Man Behind The Moustache
2. Erma Bombeck
3. Saccharine Nation
4. Homogeny
5. P.M.S.
6. We're Not Gonna Take It
7. Down 'wit A.C.P.
8. Daisy Chain For Penis 

I found out about Ancient Chinese Penis due to one of those lists of "the most ridiculous band names ever", but couldn't find any info on then, so I thought it was just a joke. Later it turned out that such a band actually existed!

COVID-19 - We All Die (2020)

Band: COVID-19

Album: We All Die

Year: 2020

Genre: Death/Doom Metal
Country: Russia

Track List: 

1. Coronavirus
2. Blood China
3. With a dead radiance life is desolating
4. Pandemia
5. See Venice and die
6. We all Die  

Bandcamp

More coronavirus-themed music here

Fearless Iranians From Hell - Die For Allah (1987)

Band: Fearless Iranians From Hell

Album: Die For Allah

Year: 1987

Genre: Thrash Metal/Punk
Country: Iran (in all seriousness - San Antonio, TX, USA)

Track List: 

1. Die For Allah
2. Deathwish
3. What's In The News
4. Life Inside Iran
5. F.I.F.H.
6. Intro/Iranians On Bikes
7. Simple Life
8. Chant
9. Ultraviolence

This one has aged surprisingly well...

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