Sunday, December 15, 2019

Ynkleudherhenavogyon - Adamant Keynvoryow Hager​-​awel Greuv (2019)

Band: Ynkleudherhenavogyon
Album: Adamant Keynvoryow Hager​-​awel Greuv
Year: 2019
Genre: Raw Black Metal, Dungeon Synth
Country: UK

Track List:
  1. Kresosel Loryow Golowan Kodh Glaw Devosel
  2. Adamant Keynvoryow Hager-awel Greuv
Bedroom black metal/synth with lyrics in Cornish language? Yeah, it is a thing. No idea what those track names mean, but they sound absolutely awesome. 

Tuesday, December 10, 2019

Screech Calamity (ex-Tranny) - Tranny (2019)

Band: Screech Calamity (ex-Tranny)
Album: Tranny
Year: 2019
Genre: Depressive Black Metal
Country: USA

Track List:
  1. Intro
  2. Music
  3. It Makes Me Feel
  4. Maybe
  5. To Be Loved like a Girl
  6. I'll Never Be Beautiful
  7. A Monster like You
  8. Tranny 
Tranny was a DSBM project by Chris Schroeder (Atmospheric Apocalypse, Esophageal Maggots, OwO, Screech Calamity, Traumatic Serenity, Embryonic Defilement, Laceration Lord, Lord Bootyquake, Sock, Thornbush, Voice of the Forest, ex-Alien Tampon, ex-Ass DJ, ex-Dankophiliac, ex-Futanari Magic Loli, ex-Grimpsy, ex-Kuikomi, ex-Lolicon Legion, ex-Pawg Beelzebub, ex-Pulse Palpitation)

"I'm not sure if I'll Transition. I just like dressing like a girl" - Chris Schroeder

Saturday, November 30, 2019

Hipster Black Metal - The Album (2019)

Band: Hipster Black Metal
Album: Hipster Black Metal - The Album
Year: 2019
Genre: Black Metal Parody
Country: USA

Track List:
  1. Intro
  2. поддельнаятушка I
  3. поддельнаятушка II
  4. HERMH - Hairless
  5. MUTTONCHOP DEATHCAMP
  6. DFICATN - D I C S U C K E R
  7. Goat bath? What's a Ghost bath?
  8. Crush The Lies (Aryan Terrorism cover)
  9. Black People Dancing to Slam Death Metal
  10. Mąʼiitsoh (Bonus Track)
  11. Outro (So Pretty Much Fuck These Guys)
Satirical musical project of the insult comedy YouTube channel Hipster Black Metal, ran by Nino R. Mejia aka helloasswipes. Bashing the clowns in the black metal industry. Tune in every week for more butthurt.
 

Tuesday, October 1, 2019

ΜΠΑΤΟΥΣΚΑ - Spiritual Rebel Propaganda (2019)

Band: ΜΠΑΤΟΥΣΚΑ
Album: Spiritual Rebel Propaganda
Year: 2019
Genre: Black Metal Parody
Country: Greece (in all seriousness, most likely USA)

Track List:
  1. Spiritual Rebel Propaganda I: Cleansing of the Black Temple (from Reactionary Crybabies)
  2. Spiritual Rebel Propaganda II: Hymn to our Dark Mothers Natalie Wynn, Kim Kelly and Anita Sarkeesian
  3. Spiritual Rebel Propaganda III: The Road to Revolution is not Paved with Fake Unity
  4. Spiritual Rebel Propaganda IV: Wanking with a Thesaurus in a Bardo Methodology Interview Doesn't Conceal Your Fascist Bullshit
  5. Spiritual Rebel Propaganda V: The Passion of Father Impatient (Papa Anypomonos)
  6. Spiritual Rebel Propaganda VI: Religious Antifascist Black Μetal Zealotry
A parody of Batushka and the related drama, the band claims to be a pair of Orthodox Monks from Mount Athos, Greece who rebelled against their spiritual leadership.
"Μπατουσκα" is the transliteration of "Batouska" in the Greek alphabet.  

Sunday, September 22, 2019

Anti-Ben - Ben: The World's Perfect Shooting Target (2001)

 Band: Anti-Ben
Album: Ben: The World's Perfect Shooting Target
Year: 2001
Genre: Grindcore, Metal Parody
Country: USA

Track List:
  1. Ten Bens in a Den
  2. Mexican Carlos (Can Bring You Burritos)
  3. A Beautiful Song for a Beautiful Lady
  4. Eat My Poop (Drink My Pee)
  5. Everytime I Hear Disco Music I Have to Shit
  6. Duck Tales Theme (Anti-Ben Mix)
  7. Fancy
  8. Glenn Benton Sounds Funny Live in Concert
  9. I Love You (Him Version)
  10. My Tribute to Black Metal
  11. High in the Sky (Chicken on Rye)
  12. Marriage Is for Bens
  13. Mary Had a Little Lamb
  14. I Want to Punch Anne Murray in the Nose
  15. Awake in Defecation
  16. Dave Matthews Ripped Me Off (and So Did Opeth)
  17. The Time Our Microphone Messed Up
  18. Mike Tyson Thinks He's Tough Because He's a Rapist
  19. Schmotz (Tears for Fears cover - Shout)
  20. This Could Be an Anal Cunt Song Because It Reminds Me of Homos
  21. Manowar Are No Kings of Metal (but Anti-Ben Is)
  22. God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You ('N Sync cover)
  23. The Last Straw
Anti-Ben are an anonymous joke band from Battle Ground, Washington (one of the coolest placenames ever), singing mostly about hating everything and everyone named Ben. They claim to be friends with Ceremonial Castings and record in the Dark Forest Studio, but NONE of the members of Ceremonial Castings are in Anti-Ben (although i seriously doubt it). Anyway, the funniest thing about them is that they're still somewhat active after almost 20 years, and even have released several full-length albums.

FUCK YOU BEN!

Saturday, August 31, 2019

The Kominas - Wild Nights in Guantánamo Bay (2008)

Band: The Kominas
Album: Wild Nights in Guantánamo Bay
Year: 2008
Genre: Punk, Taqwacore
Country: USA

Track List:
  1. Sharia Law in the USA
  2. Chaku!
  3. Ayesha
  4. Dishoom Bebe
  5. Par Desi
  6. 9000 Miles
  7. Wal-Qaeda Superstore
  8. Blow Shit Up
  9. Layla
  10. Rabyah
  11. I Want A Handjob
  12. Suicide Bomb The GAP
  13. Rumi Was A Homo (bonus)
Islamic punk rock played by Pakistani-Americans and meant to be offensive to everyone from Islamists to American conservatives. 
Terrorists Win!

Sunday, July 7, 2019

Racetraitor - 2042 (2018)

Band: Racetraitor
Album: 2042
Year: 2018
Genre: Hardcore
Country: USA

Track List:
  1. Three Minutes Of Hate
  2. The Lion And The Lamb
  3. BLK XMAS
  4. By The Time I Get To Pennsylvannia
  5. Aylanoor
  6. Cataclysm
  7. The Cult Of Eschatology
  8. Unhinged
  9. The Universal Corrective Map Of The World
  10. Rooz Va Aftab
"Racetraitor was a metalcore band from Chicago, Illinois who managed to get on the covers of both Maximum Rock N' Roll and HeartattaCk before releasing a note of music. Known for calling audience members "crackers" and for espousing beliefs influenced by black nationalism, third worldism and other anti-colonial ideologies (and for some members, eventually, Islam)... The idea was to take the pejorative term "race traitor" used by white American racists and claim it as a positive self-chosen label"
 

Monday, July 1, 2019

Anti Katholisch - The False Religion (2017)

Band: Anti Katholisch
Album: The False Religion
Year: 2017
Genre: (Un)Black Metal/Noise 
Country: Mexico

Track List:
  1. Intro
  2. The False Religion
  3. Blackened Angry Judas
  4. Ende der Finsternis
  5. Black Magic (Garbage)
  6. Dunkelheit
Christian (but Anti-Catholic) black metal from Mexico. Quite possibly the worst stuff I've heard in the whole unblack metal genre.

Sunday, June 2, 2019

Exmortes - Hear the Saw... Coming Near (1990)

Band: Exmortes
Album: Hear the Saw... Coming Near
Year: 1990
Genre: No-Effort Black Metal/Noise
Country: Netherlands

Track List:
  1. Prophecy
  2. Creed of Eternal
  3. Throne of Death
  4. Lacerated Sky
... Maybe a little bit more flanger on the guitar? Also, what's with all those awful Dutch black metal/noise bands from 90s? Apator, Satanic Death, Botulistum, Christfighter, and now this ...

Saturday, June 1, 2019

Satanic Death - Braincancer (1990)

Band: Satanic Death
Album: Braincancer
Year: 1990
Genre: Black Noise
Country: Netherlands

Officially released by Necroscum Produxions, 1990 (scum002)
This is Satanic Death's first demo and is re-released in December of 2017 on Tape by Tenebrae Sumus Records.